My World
by baileyzoeylucymitchie1234
Summary: Zoey returns to PCA yet again, but finds this year will be more dramatic and surprising than before. Set after  Chasing Zoey. Zoey/Chase
1. Chapter 1: The First Monday Back

My World

Chapter 1: Monday

(Zoey's POV)

My name is Zoey Brooks, I'm in my fourth year at PCA and it's my first day of lessons after the summer holidays, I really enjoyed my holiday, I spent it with my best friend and new boyfriend Chase.

"Zoey! Wake up!" I heard Lola shout. I dragged myself out of my single bed and made my way to the toilet. Lola and Quinn both had Maths first and I had science with Chase. After I washed my face and cleaned my teeth I got dressed and picked up my bag.

"See ya later Zo" Lola told me as she and Quinn left the room to go to their class. I followed them out after getting the keys for my pink Jet X and locked the door after myself. I left my Hall and hopped onto my Jet X and made my way to class.

"Hey you" Chase said the minute he saw me. "Hey you" I said back as he kissed me on the cheek.

""Hi Zoey" said a familiar voice, I turned around and saw my ex boyfriend James Garrett looking at me "Oh, hi James" that was all I managed to say to him "How are you?" he asked me. I was just about to think of an answer when Chase turned around and said; "Oh hey, Zoey this is my new roommate James Garrett". I was didn't know what to say then James answered back; "We already know each other, we went out with each other last year".


	2. Chapter 2: A Few Surprises

As I took my seat next to Chase, I avoided eye-contact with him because I just knew he wanted to know everything that had happened with me and James. Over our vacation together, I literally forgot about him, so I hadn't mentioned anything to Chase, just like he didn't really tell me anything about how his life went at Covington. Mr Charleton, a new science teacher starting this year, was standing at the front of the science lab and we all fell silent as he began introducing himself. Throughout the lesson I looked at Chase and he smiled at me everytime, but I also couldn't help looking at James. I felt a little guilty just leaving him to get (officially) together with Chase, especially after he went to so much trouble buying me a necklace and having "I love you, James" specially embroded on to it. But that is what made me realise how much I missed and loved Chase and that he was coming back so that we could be together. I made it through the entire lesson without Chase asking me any questions about my relationship with James. But I couldn't shake the thought of Chase asking James, seen as they are roommates and god knows what James would say. Chase and I had to go our seperate ways when the bell went, as we both had two different lessons next. As I made my way to English, I realised James was in this class. Despite sitting on the same table, I avoided communication with him and made it to break time. As the bell rung after 50 minutes of silence, I was one of the first out of the classroom and headed straight to my pink Jet X, who was waiting for me outside the English Department and made my way to Room 101, little did I know a huge surprise was waiting for me there.

I parked my Jet-X in the Danver Girls Hall's bike and scooter shed. As I made my way up the stairs and turned in the direction of Room 101 I saw Lola sitting on her hands and knees crying in front of the closed door. "Lola are you okay?" I said running towards her. I could barely make out what she was trying to tell me only "Vince...her" as I lifted her off the floor she was crying into my ear as I turned the key. I opened the door only to find our room had been turned over corner to corner. "What the fuck happened in here! Has someone broke in our room?" I shouted as Lola threw herself onto my mattress which was no longer on my bed. "It was Quinn! I had never seen her so angry!" Lola shouted throughout her sobbing. Why on earth would Quinn do somthing like this? Of all the years I've known her, I couldn't think of a reason why. I asked Lola and she said; "She had another arguement with Logan, and I think that one has actually ended their relationship for good!" I was confused, Logan and Quinn looked like the happiest couple in the world at the end-of-year dance in July (next to me and Chase of course) but I was aware that they have been arguing lately, but never the reason. "Is this why your crying?" I said to Lola, who was now sobbing into a fluffy sea-blue coloured pillow. "No, I'm crying because...because I walked in on Vince and he was...he was having sex with Monica Baker!" I quickly rushed over to her and embraced her into a hug. "I'm so sorry Lola, I know you really thought he had changed". At first I didn't believe Lola when she came to our room last year and said she had started dating Vince Blake after he joined her yoga class, but over time I started believing he had, and so did everyone else. I guess we were all fooled. The only person who I seem to think didn't believe Vince was Michael, even though he was dating Lisa Perkins at the time, he seemed to be showing alot of care and protection towards Lola. I've been seeing connections between the both of them since Lola started at PCA a year after I did, she and Michael appear to have alot in common. But most people believe that is what makes them good friends, but I think it's something more.

Whilst I was reasurring Lola, Stacy knocked on the door of our dorm. Now lisp free, from her minor accident at the end-of-year dance in which she was knocked down by Michael's car she said; "Hey guys, Coco wants to see you in lounge". Lola cleaned herself up while I assured Stacy that the state of our room was nothing for her to worry about and then we made our way downstairs and approached Coco, who was eating a bowl of salad (as usual) and was talking to-oh my god! Non-other than my best friend in the entire world Nicole Bristow! She screamed, I screamed we ran into a hug as we now do everytime we meet up. Don't get me wrong, I am close with Lola and Quinn, but Nicole and I have been best friends since the first day we both arrived at PCA. I was devistated when she told me couldn't come to PCA last year because her mom was concerned about her suffering from Obsessive Male Gender Disorder and sent her to an all-girls school in Malibu. That was too far away for me, but we somehow managed to stay as close as we did by phone calls, e-mails and any other form of communication we could, it was difficult some times with her being in Malibu and me here in Los Angeles but our friendship was strong enough to handle it.

"Okay, I've got some good news and some bad news" Coco said shovelling her spoon deeper and deeper into her bowl of salad, "The good news is Nicole is moving back in with you two". I was over the moon until a sudden thought came to my mind; "Wait, what about Quinn?" I asked worridly,  
I hadn't seen her since we departed Room 101 for morning classes and Lola was so distracted with her grieving over Vince, she hadn't seen Quinn since her violent rant when she took her anger out on our room. "Quinn's left PCA, she broke up with Logan Reese and was so angry and upset she completly destroyed your room, packed her stuff and went to tell Dean Rivers she wants to leave right now". Lola and I were shocked, not about the break up, we kind of guessed that was coming weeks ago, but not that it would take so much emotion from Quinn that she would want to leave without saying a word. Nicole knew that Logan and Quinn were dating, and arguing, due to me keeping her updated with what was happening in our gang. "Yes, well my job hear is done, I'll see you guys later" Coco said in a miserable and emotionless tone as she shovelled more of her salad in her mouth and walked away leaving us standing in middle of the lounge with three very different expressions on our faces.

The three of us headed back to Room 101, Lola and I were putting the room back together (luckily Quinn didn't break anything of ours during her rage) whilst Nicole set up her bed on the bottom bunk and pulled her stuff out of her suitcase. The bell went, signalling the end of break when we just finished finalising our room and we all departed our seperate ways to our third lesson of the day.

At lunch time, I was starving and went straight to the cafeteria to put together my tray of selections for my lunch, headed outside to the benches and made my way towards the one particular bench our gang had claimed for ourselves, it was the one out of the way of everyone else and had a beautiful view looking over the atlantic ocean that surrounded us. Chase had saved me a seat next to him and to my surprise everyone was already here. Including James. I once again avoided eye contact with him as I placed my tray down on the table and took my seat in between Chase and Nicole. I looked around the table at my friends, Lola and Michael were sitting quite close and she looked happy, maybe she had told Michael about Vince and he was probably straight there for her (as I predicted). I took a quick glance at James, who looking up and smiling repeatedly in my direction, I started to panic until I realised it wasn't me he was doing it to, it was Nicole! I was completly taken by surprise, when I was distracted by Logan, who looked pleased with himself, even though he had only broke up with Quinn a few hours earlier said; "Okay, now everyone is here, I just want to let you in on something," We were all listening intently. "As you all probably know, Quinn and I have broke up" He hesitated before carrying on, "The truth is, she wasn't happy with my so-called attitude" Logan put his fingers up doing the quote sign as he said this. "But the real reason she got angry was because...it was because I have started going out with Dana Cruz" We were all stunned, except for James, who doesn't know who Dana is. Lola however, has only seen a photo of her, but has never met her in person. Nicole and Dana did not get along at all when she was our roomate in our first year, and I haven't really spoken to her since she told me she wasn't going to be back for our second year here at PCA. We were all mostly stunned because Logan and Dana couldn't stand each other when she was here. They were too much alike, miserable, arrogant, didn't really care much for everyone else's feelings but their own and just plain fed up with life. "You guys just don't really understand, she's changed and since we started e-mailing each other after she said she wanted to get back in touch with all us here at PCA, we kinda connected you know?" I felt like going "aww" at those last words, because it seems to me that Logan and Dana had both grown up during the two years she has been away and now they know each other again, it's like true love has gotten a hold of them and made them realise the love that was hidden in both of them since the begining and it is sweet because none of us saw that connection either.

"And you'll never guess what, she is speaking to her parents about leaving the European Exchange Program and tranfering back PCA" Logan said with an excited look on his face. By the way he said this, he made it sound like he and Dana had began a relationship while he was with Quinn,  
and I know she had strong feelings for him and I think he did too until Dana came back into his life. Quinn had every right to get angry because she thought Logan was past his "being a player days" and Quinn never liked Dana whilst she was here and if she knew Dana was coming back to PCA she wouldn't want to be here. I mean lets admit it, who would want stay somewhere where the boy they thought loved them will be with his new girlfriend, who he left you for.

Good god, that's most likely how James feels right now, he loved me but I just threw it back in his face and ran into Chase's arms, which had been open, waiting patiently, for me for over three years. What kind of monster am I?


	3. Chapter 3: My Feelings in Question

The bell rung at 3:30, the end of the day was finally here. The gang was going to our favorite beach straight after school, it was the one we all accidently got stranded on at the end of our first year together at PCA because the taxi driver was given the wrong address, but never mind we all had a great time in the end. We introduced Lola to it in her first year and James just after we started dating. Chase and I were walking hand-in-hand along the beach whilst everyone else was minding their own business. That was when I saw it, I looked up to see Lola and Michael kissing! "Didn't you know Zo?" Chase looked at me with surprise. "When Lola told us what Vince had done, Michael was fumming and went straight to confront Vince. It got violent of course knowing what Vince is like, but Lola thought it was the sweetest thing and then they sorta confessed their feelings for each other." Chase explained and I felt so happy for my two friends, glad my theory about them having a thing going on was now proven to be true. James and Nicole were talking but I noticed whenever Nicole was distracted by Lola and Michael talking to her, James glancing over at me, I quickly looked away everytime. When Chase and I went to join the others sitting on the large rocks seperating the beach and the hill leading up to the road, Logan was running up to us, he had been on the phone to Dana. "Guys, Dana's parents said yes! She'll be coming back to PCA on Friday!" Logan was being totally out of character, jumping around in hysterics. We all laughed as he is obviously "crazy in love".

Throughout the week, Logan was getting more and more excited about Dana's upcoming return and the more time Lola spent with Michael, the more she forgot about how Vince was an asshole towards her. That was all she needed really, just a real boyfriend to love and protect her. Nicole and I were getting back to way we used to be, her year at an all-girls school has really made an impact on her, she was now easier to talk to because she doesn't get distracted so much by boys anymore.

On Thursday, I was going to see my younger brother Dustin, he had sent me a note demanding that I come to help him with a problem he had. I had no objection towards this, only that I was surprised, seen as he thinks I mother him too much, which I think is so not true. "So, there is this girl..."Dustin explained when I arrived at his very messy and un-organised "typical boys room". He said that he wanted some advice about how I gotten together with all the boys I've dated in my life so he could try some of these on this girl. "Well, Dustin you have understand that my love life isn't exactly amazing-" I was cut off by Dustin "I know but how did you actually get together with James?" I told him the truth, I wasn't gonna lie, James and I started as friends having dinner together at Sushi Rox and then the next thing you know, we've started kissing. I must admit, the day James arrived at PCA and the moment we first layed eyes on each other we did have a connection. "I suppose I could try asking her to have dinner with me, maybe after we've gotten to know each other something might happen" I nodded my head in agreement. Job well done Zoey. I praised myself for being the helpful big sister as I got up to leave. "Zoey?" Dustin said just as I opened the door, "What happened with James? One minute you were perfectly happy, the next your with Chase. I don't get it" Dustin had a point, I was hardly minutes away from breaking up with James when Chase and I had our first kiss. "I don't really know Dustin, I guess I just had a moment where I didn't really know what my heart was trying to tell me".

I was leaving Dustin's hall when my phone vibrated in my pocket as I recieved a text, from James;

Will you please come to my room? I just want to to talk - J.

I hesitated as I turned in the direction of his hall and through the corridors towards the room my boyfriend shares with his two best friends and my ex-boyfriend. I knocked on the door and let myself in. James was sitting on his bed, the bottom bunk of one the two sets of bunk beds, as this has now become a four bedroom dorm since Chase returned. He smiled at the sight of me and stood up immediatly. "Zo, I'm glad you came." He said this with small amount of excitement in his voice. "I just wanted to talk about what really happened that night at the end-of-year dance. You know when you...when you left me?"

I could feel the guilt I have been trying to avoid since I found out Chase and James were going to be roomates this year...and both in love with me. "James, I am so sorry, I never meant to hurt you. I just didn't know what to do." He looked at me as I said it, he was fiddling with something in his hand. "It's just that...when you told me you loved me, I didn't know what to do because...because Chase had already told me he loves me and I really didn't know what to do." He didn't look at me this time, just carried on fiddling with whatever was in his hand. "So, you thought the best thing was to just get with Chase?" James said this with a slight anger showing on the last three words.

"Well, all I was going to do when Chase surprised me with the news that he was back, and being his clumsy self he fell down the stairs. I only wanted see if he was okay and ask him about his feelings towards me. Trust me, I was still hurt over our split, but then he and I just kissed and then...we went to the dance together and everybody was so excited that we were finally together I just didn't have a choice. My dad then invited him to come on holiday for the summer with us and I didn't have the time to come find you, James" I explained it all quickly hoping he wouldn't get mad (the thought of me with Chase romantically did not seem to sit well with him) he just nodded, still fiddling with what's in his hand, I took a step closer to him. "Zo, when Chase kissed you, did you...did you forget all about me?" It wasn't when Chase and I kissed it was the holiday that made me forget about James and our unexpected break-up.

"No, I never forgot about us, honest" I said grabbing his hand. "You know, when I told you I loved you...did...do feel the same? You never told me because of...Chase." It was true I never did answer his question, as soon as I heard the words "I Love You" and because they weren't coming out of Chase's mouth, I was distracted by the thought of him to even consider my feelings towards James. "We had some amazing and wonderful times together James. But I think-" James stopped me, mid setntence. "Are you trying to tell me that your choosing him because you've known him longer and he's won you over with some sob story about love at first sight?" Those last words hurt, they also showed me the misunderstanding and jelously about how much James knows about mine and Chase's whole history. "Zoey, do you even know weather the feelings are mutual when it comes to him? You can't just say that you love him just because he claims to have loved you since the day he met you?" James was right. If Chase was certain about his feelings towards me, I was still left confused about my own feelings towards him and James.

James was now looking at me, his blue-green eyes looking directly into my brown ones. I really didn't know what to say next. But there was no need, James' lips were now pressed against mine. At first I refused, not saying anything just shaking my head but James wouldn't stop, eventually I gave in kissing him back. He always had a way with me, and I had missed his gentle touch and that warm feeling whenever he kissed me. He pulled me in close and I was so carried away I wrapped my arms around his neck. I couldn't believe it, Zoey Brooks is a cheater.


	4. Chapter 4: Zoey The Monster

James had carried me over to his bed, placing me underneath him as his kisses moved from my lips to around my face and then trailing down my neck. We did this when were together occasionally, but this time James was more hungry and excited for my body. But I can't do this. I begin pushing to push him off me, when a sudden pair of hands grabbed his shoulders and pulled him up. It was Chase. He must of came in whilst we were in a moment of heat together as neither of us had heard the door open. Fists were flying, one into James' face and one returned into Chase's face, I jumped up to seperate them just a they had pushed each other across the room and into the big flat screen on the wall. I pulled them apart, both of them had blood on their faces and were so angry.

"I'm sorry Chase" I say before running out of their room full speed. I just couldn't stand what I have done, I've cheated and caused a fight between two people I've loved at least once in my life. I just need to get away, clear my head and decide what I really want want right now so I won't go to Room 101, I don't feel like facing the girls, I instead leave the PCA grounds and make my way to the closest deserted beach.

I switch my phone off as I make myself comfortable on a large flat rock and look at the sunset behind the endless sea. I think about Chase and James, how I could believe that one of them is the right one for me. What if it is none of them? I remember all good times I have had with Chase over the past three years and how he had fallen more and more in love with me during each event. How could I have been so blind? All the clumseness around me, the jelousy over a new relationship I gain including when I dated Dean Rivers' son and the boy I went with the dance with in my first year, even when I was casted to play Logan's love interest in a play once. I never once believed anyone (close friend or even a relative) when they tried to convince me that Chase likes me more than a best friend, maybe if I had let myself take the message in none of this would of happened and Chase and I could of gotten together a long time ago, and all this shit with James would never have started. I began to think about James, and about the three months we had together. There was our first kiss, the dinner we attempted to have at a really posh and expensive resturant, which we were later forced to finish on the volley ball court thanks to our friends, and all our private kissing sessions that no one else had the right to know about. And finally, it was when James told me he loved me and gave me that necklace.

I sighed putting my hands in my pockets deep in thought, until I felt something in my left pocket. It was the necklace, this was what James was fiddling with while we were talking. He must have slipped it in there before Chase walked in, probably thinking that now we were kissing again, that we were back together. I didn't put it on, just kept it in my hand while the sun was going down. I was way past curfew now, but I don't care. I need more time for myself.

I woke up to find that I spent the entire night on that rock. I figured Nicole would probably have noticed I hadn't came back all night and could be panicing by now so I made my way back to PCA, thinking of ways to avoid both Chase and James. When I returned to Danver Girls Hall an hour later, I saw my single bed was not there. Had they thought I had died or something? "Zoey!" Nicole shouted as I walked through the door. "Where have you been I was worried when you hadn't come back last night?" I told her I just "been around" and she took this as if I was hiding some dark secret. "Do wanna talk about something?". "Oh no, it's fine honestly" I said this calmly and as normally as I possibly could,  
best friend or not, there was no way she could help me work out my feelings especially when it comes to my love life.

"We've been renovated. We are now a four person dorm-room starting today. They came about half an hour ago and took your bad apart and they are later coming back to put the new bunk bed together." Nicole explained to me, I had been so busy with my trainwreck of a love life that I had forgotten that Dana was coming back today, but I didn't know that she would be moving in with us in Room 101. My mattress, quilt, pillow and my precicous teddy that I have had since birth were on the floor in front of the wardrobe, I suppose I would have to have the top bunk when Dana gets here as I remember her literally taking Nicole's stuff off the bottom bunk of the bunk beds in the room we shared together in our first year. Even though I was someone who doesn't take shit of anyone and never alow myself to be walked all over, I've known since day one that Dana isn't one to be enemies with.

During the school day, I didn't even look at Chase or James I only spoke to Nicole and Lola and I didn't have lunch with the gang, I went straight back to the dorm, and as Nicole said the second bunk bed had been put together and was waiting for Dana and myself. At the end of the school day I was forced to be near James and Chase because Logan had dragged all of us to the main gates of the school, just to greet Dana when she arrived. I stood next to Nicole, hiding from both of their sights. After what seemed like ages a taxi finally pulled up and Dana jumped out pulling a large black suitcase behind her. Logan ran straight towards her and they stood hugging (and kissing) for like five minutes. When they let go, Dana was smiling at all of us. "Hi! I'm Dana Cruz" She said looking at Lola and James. "It's so nice to see all of you again. Including you Nicole, I know we weren't exatly friends before, but I was hoping we could change that". Nicole smiled and nodded as a reply, I didn't know exactly how this plan could work but I was way too taken back by the way Dana was acting, Logan was right she really has changed.

I was forced to spend longer time in the presence of Chase and James when we went to Sushi Rox for a few hours to catch up with Dana. I succesfully avoided speaking and was relieved when the girls and I returned to Room 101, that was of course after the happy couples that surrounded me had finished kissing-I mean snogging goodbye. I stood next to Nicole again and took a glance at James, who was standing a good space away from Chase, who was looking at me with a upset face, he must miss me since I haven't had any form of communication with him since his fight with James; who looked very unhappy himself. Surely they both must understand why I don't want to speak to them, I cheated on Chase and convinced James I wanted to get back together and then just left him. Who would want to be with a monster like me who crushes everbody's feelings? These were my thoughts when I climbed into my bed without saying a word to Nicole, Lola or Dana. 


	5. Chapter 5: Confessions

I sat on my bed, still in my pyjamas as my roommates were getting ready to go out. "Are you sure you don't want to come Zoey?" Lola said to my reflection in the mirror as she straightened her shoulder-length brunette hair. I shook my head looking at floor. I had a dream that night which made me sink into such a depression I couldn't stand the thought of being near either one of them again, my thoughts on everything racing around in my head as I slept made me even more confused on the problem which has now become my life. Dana approached me looking confused. "Zoey what happened to you? When I knew you two years ago you were a completly different person and now I haven't heard you speak once since I got back here" I looked at her, it was true I used to be confident, never afraid to speak my mind and a caring and friendly person. Now I am depressed, very rarely speak, considers myself a monster who runs around breaking boys hearts and has given up on life completly. "I'm sorry Dana, I'm going through a really bad time right now" I said lifting my head up to her. Lola and Nicole joined Dana and all three of them gathered around me."Why, what's happened Zoey? We know it's you and Chase because we noticed you didn't speak to him all day yesterday" Nicole said with a serious look on her face.

As much as I didn't want to tell them I blurted out the entire story, starting with me over hearing Chase's confession to Michael and Logan and then meeting James after Chase had been forced to stay at Covington for a semester by his parents, I then explained what happened on Thursday and how I was now a confused mess, struggling to go on with life. When I had finished, they all had sympathetic looks on their faces and I knew they were struggling to come up with some advice to help me. "Maybe you should just talk to them?" Was Lola's suggestion. "Maybe you should try to ask them about being friends until you know for sure what you want?" Dana made her suggestion. "I agree with both of those Zoey,  
you can't just avoid them the rest of your life". Nicole was right, but I was afraid they would just have another fight over me if I had them both in the same room together disscussing their feelings for me. They eventually convinced me to come with them on their trip to the shopping center not far from PCA, as it's the weekend we are allowed off the campus. Still depressed, I dragged myself into the taxi with them.

At around twelve, we stopped for something to eat, as Lola and Nicole were getting our sandwiches at the counter, Dana attempted to cheer me up and get my mind of my dilema. "I like the way have you have your hair now Zoey" She said to me smiling "Thank you, I like yours too" I replied with little joy in my voice. When Dana and I last seen each other, I had my natural bright blonde hair just past my shoulders and she had short brunette hair which were always in curls resting on her shoulders. Now however, Dana supported long perfectly straight hair whilst still being a natural brunette, I now had dirty blonde hair and supported matching extentions which were perfectly straight. Over the last two years I have changed my hairstyle rapidly but so far this is my favorite look, even with my bright blonde roots starting to show on the top of my head.

Lola and Nicole returned and I dug into my beef sandwich, I tried to take my mind off Chase and James as I listened to Lola and Dana get know each other a bit more. "I will be an actress one day, you can bet your life on it" Lola said with almighty confidence, she is actually an amazing actress, better than me anyday and I have total believe that she will make it one day. Dana seemed to like this; "Well I will a pro in the basketball career I am headed for. Zoey do still play basktball?" she turned to me. "Yeah, but I've never really thought of making a career out of it, Miss Harolds says she thinks I could be successful in a writing career if I kept my journalism up" I explained a little more cheerfully, I guess sociallising is improving my depression. Nicole joined in, "You know, when I was in Malibu, I discovered my passion was in my art skills, my teacher there was encouraging me to consider taking up a career in working for art galleries, he believes I have potential". I began joing in with more conversations and got to know alot more about Dana and her life in Paris until the point where I had forgotten about my troubled relationships with Chase and James. That was until I got back to PCA that afternoon.

The girls had literally dragged me to lounge where we were meeting the boys, I was refusing, knowing I had to take their advice and try to be in the same room as the pair of them. I sat next to Nicole on the purple couch with large multi-coulored spots on it, she was laughing at Michael and Logan's joke which I wasn't listening to as I could feel two sets of eyes watching me as I stared at the floor. After five minutes I couldn't take it anymore and was rushing up the stairs back to Room 101. With Chase right behind me calling my name.

"Zo, wait it's about time we talked" He said catching his breath as he shut the door behind him. "Chase, I thought you wouldn't want to know me after you saw me with James" I said as he sat down next me on the yellow couch which was placed underneath the window. "No, Zo I know you wouldn't do something like that ever "He said looking directly into my eyes "I knew he would try to get back together with you, and it wasn't the first fight I've had with him. When I asked him if he still had any feelings for you, he said yes and that's when we both started to get angry and he started a fight with me" I was shocked.

I knew Chase would try to have an honest man-to-man conversation with James about me, but I suppose James' true feelings of jelousy had got a hold of his temper and the fighting was a way of showing that James knew Chase had won my heart since the beginning. "This is what I tried to tell you Zo, after you broke that fight up, but you left so quickly because you felt so ashamed I didn't have the chance and then you didn't even look at me for two days". It was all true, I was so confused and shocked at what I had done, I never did think about anyone else's side of the story. James' was now clear to me; he was refusing to believe that I truly loved Chase and tried everything in his power to make me think otherwise. Whilst Chase's was clear from the beginning. From the moment Chase saw me step out of my dad's car he fell in love with me, oblivious to this for three whole years, I am now starting to believe maybe this was for a particular reason, weather you believe fate has anything to do with this or not, it was clear that I was never supposed to feel the same way until that moment I heard it come from Chase himself on the web-chat that had been left on by accident.

"Zoey, I understand if you don't want to get back together now, I've noticed you've looked and been acting very depressed lately. If you need space I will understand" Chase said, he looked disapointed as he said this as I know he would do anything to make sure I'm happy 24/7. Chase kissed me on the cheek as he got up to leave. I stopped him immediatly shooting myself up off the couch as if I had been struck by lightning.

"No Chase, we've been seperated way too long and I'm talking about since the day we met. I love you, Chase and I never want to be without you again" I said, my heart full of emotion as he pulled me into a romantic kiss, sweeping me off my feet. James will have face it. Chase and I were made for each other. 


	6. Chapter 6: A Chat With Quinn

My depression was slowly going away as Chase and I walked hand-in-hand towards the lounge. There was a mixture of different facial expressions, most were happy but James looked angry. "What do you think your doing Chase!" He shouted so loud every head in the room turned. I was filled with embarassment as I heard a childish rant of "She loves me!, No she loves me!" then Chase and James were throwing punches and rolling around on the floor, knocking the sofa over as people were running from the room at risk of their own safety. All I could do was stand there and watch the mess I had created get worse with every hit that was thrown. Michael and Logan were attempting to get a hold of the both of them to split them up. "What is going on!" Mr. Bender and Ms. Burvich had come into the lounge, eyes glaring. Chase didn't mention anything about me, instead was just honest that he and James had a fight, James didn't mention me either, as did all the witnesses. "Well, you were still fighting even though there wasn't an excuse. We still have to take you to Dean Rivers right now" Ms. Burvich said giving evil eyes towards the pair of them. She shoohed them out and Mr. Bender looked at my distraught face before leaving with them.

Michael and Logan left to follow them to Dean Rivers' office while I sulked my way towards Room 101, behind a panicing Nicole, a shocked Lola and a confused Dana. Both of them could be facing exclusion for this, and it will be all my fault. I couldn't care less about James, but I don't know how long I could stay at PCA without Chase. Nicole opened the door and I just threw myself onto my bed, lying face down into the quilt. At eleven o'clock we had all given up hope on hearing something tonight so we got ready for bed.

I woke up on the Sunday morning to find myself alone in the dormroom. Lola, Nicole and Dana had obviously not woken me, hopping to hear that it is good news that they will have to break to me later. My depression had gotten so bad overnight, I could barely get myself out of bed, choosing not leave my room I think of things to do until the that haunting moment where I will find out what is happening to Chase. I decide to check my emails on the big computer that is shared between the four of us, there is one from my mom, wondering why I haven't spoken to her in a week, one from Dustin saying that my advice had worked and he has a new girlfriend. I reply to these two, putting on a happy tone and then I notice that there is one from Quinn, she is requesting a web-chat.

I press connect and sure enough there is Quinn's face smiling at me. "Hi Zoey" she says warmly. "I know this is weird but I think your the only one I can confide in right now" I smile lightly, how could I could give her some advice like I used to when I feel like throwing myself out of the window right now. "I suppose you want to know excatly what happened the day I left, right?" She says. "Well, I did love Logan. But I just couldn't cope with his arogant and selfish character. I guess I didn't really think about that when I got with him openly at the dance" She shrugged her shoulders. "We were also arguing because I found out about him and Dana. He left his laptop out with all his e-mails in plain sight, I was shocked when I read the one where he had asked her out. And then on Monday, when I left, it was because he told me he wanted to break-up because Dana was coming back to PCA. I was so angry I couldn't help but just throw all the room around. I'm sorry Zoey" She really did look sorry "It's okay Quinn, I'm not bothered that you trashed the room. I understand why you did it, I mean, Logan will always be Logan" I say still smiling slightly.

"I know, but I am over him now. You'll never guess what Zoey! I ran into a boy I knew before I came to PCA, we got talking and we really connected so...I guess were together now" Quinn looked so happy, and I was happy for her, although I didn't show it. "How is everything at PCA since I left?" Quinn looked like she wanted to know, but I didn't fancy the idea of telling her Dana had come back and that her and Logan were the happiest couple at school. I also couldn't bare the thought of her reaction if I told her I am depressed. I once had to help her out of a depression in our second year, but that was over her missing her pet alpaca though, whearas mine is much more dificult to overcome. "Well, Nicole came back on Monday, which I was so happy about," Quinn looked happy as well, she and Nicole were good friends for the two years they were here together. "Vince Blake cheated on Lola with a girl from the cheerleading squad, but it's all good now because Lola and Michael have gotten together" Quinn thought that was brilliant news, she never really trusted Vince either. "Erh, Dana um moved back and she is our third roommate" I said shakily, I was worried Quinn might get angry again. "Oh, well I suppose it is best that Logan and I are both happy even though we've split" Quinn looked satisfied as maybe she knew Logan would feel no emotion after leaving her for Dana.

"Are you okay Zoey? You seem very sad" Quinn looked through her computer screen with concern as I struggled to explain how my emotions are a mixture of guilt, confusement and self-hatred. Quinn listened intently and was finding it difficult to believe how long it took me to realise how much I loved Chase and how selfish James was being.

We had been talking for an hour when she told me she had to go, Quinn asked me not to tell Logan or Dana that we had talked and I said I wouldn't, we agreed to keep in touch with regular e-mails. Before disconnecting, Quinn wished me luck in coming out of my depression safely, she hoped I wouldn't try something dangerous if things got worse.


	7. Chapter 7: Not The Happiest Of Endings

I spent the rest of the day sleeping, it's all my depression wanted me to do. I woke up to a knock on the door, my body was refusing to get up, so I made myself yell; "Come in". Chase slowly walked in. Oh god, here it comes. I braced myself as he kissed my forehead and sat on my bed. I made myself sit up and come out from under the covers, I wrapped my arms around Chase and rested my head on his shoulder as I did this he just stared at the floor as he began to tell me our future.

"When we got to Dean Rivers' office, he said he had no choice but to exclude me and James because fighting is against the school rules. I'll be gone for the next semester" I was sobbing as he pulled me into a hug. I couldn't believe it, I was forced to spend an entire semester away from Chase last year due to a major twist of events, but now I don't know how I could cope this time round, especially now I know that I love Chase as much as he has always loved me. "Are you sure you can't take some other form of punishment? Like; hundreds of detentions, cleaning the grounds or-or anything other than exclution?" I cried into his shirt. "No Zo. His decision is final, there is nothing anyone can do." He said while stroking my hair, he is just as upset as me, but Chase only cries if he's in pain, it's the tone of his voice showing me how upset he is. I lifted my head off his now tear-stained shirt, I looked into his eyes and then I started to kiss him, I was in control until he pushed me down onto the bed. Our kissing became hungrier, until my hands were under his shirt feeling his stomach, his hands were smoothly going down the sides of my body, we were kissing for a while until we assisted each other remove our clothing.

It has been four weeks already, but Chase won't be back until after the christmas break. Unfortunatly, James will return too, but I think this exclusion has made him realise that he and I will never happen again, he and Chase will still be roommates as they were talked to by the PCA guidance counselor about anger and learning to get along better. My depression is improving, Chase going away had made it worse, but Nicole convinced me to see the guidance counselor weekly, which I am proud to say is a success. Chase's parents were not impressed with his behaviour and the exclusion, so he is having to work for them as his punishment, with me busy with classes and him working we just manage to talk at least twice a week, texting whenever we can and web chats whenever possible.

I miss him. I don't know how I am still going without seeing him, his crazy frow, his clumseness, his smile that appears everytime I come into his sight, I still have Nicole who's always great company for me, despite her bubbly and slightly odd character, but that's why we're best friends because I am the only one who won't leave her because of her crazy. Lola and Dana have become really close over the last month that Dana has been back, Lola and Michael are still going strong as are Logan and Dana. Quinn and I are still talking, she is happy being back home with her new boyfriend and pet alpca Otis. James is still friends with everyone, he talks to Logan and Michael often and Chase told me that he and James have somewhat settled their issues and are working towards a better future as roommates, when I spoke to James he mentioned that he just wants what is best for me, which is obviously being with Chase. He also said that he sort of fancies someone else, when he said that it was Nicole, I was so surprised. In fact, I can't believe I never noticed it sooner, from the minute Nicole came back to PCA, he couldn't stop looking at her and I thought she might have noticed it too, maybe even liking him back. Dustin is happy, I've met his new girlfriend, Mara Jane, she is nice I can see how much Dustin likes her and they seem to be really happy together. Altough I am happy for him and all my happy couple friends I surround myself with, it reminds just how much I miss Chase.

So it is a happy ending for everyone but me, I must admit in my case, it's not the happiest of endings, but I know things are going to get much better in time.


End file.
